Donuts, Cheese, and PTSD
Happy Belated World Mental Health Day! To celebrate, I was busy taking a mental health day. Right after I was finished "celebrating," I spoke with someone very dear to me about possibly doing the cover of the next novel in the works. It was far from a lovely day, but also far from the worst one--plus, for me, any day above ground is decent for me.
I'll bet none of you know that I have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD for short. For nearly two years, I've been living with this lovely part of me, wondering what it will do next. Some months are tough while others I manage to escape unscathed. It's up and down, and everything I never wanted. It's also everything I've ever needed.
It's helped to shape me into who I am today. It's helped me realize that I am far more capable than I ever would've imagined. It's helped me realize that I can release the demons that haunt my mind onto pen and paper, and hopefully insipire someone else along the way. Most importantly, it's helped me realize that I am defined by way more than just four uppercase letters. With PTSD, I managed to travel thousands of miles away from home by myself to a country where a language other than English was prominent. With PTSD, I managed to get back up and continue on through college. With PTSD, I've managed to public speak and help educate others. With PTSD, I was a successful preschool teacher. Don't get me wrong--with PTSD, I made my fair share of mistakes. But then again, I managed to do that without it as well.
I'm still an author. I'm still a sister and a daughter. I'm still an avid lover of donuts, brownies, greasy Chicago-style pizza and anything that isn't a green, leafy vegetable. I'm still me, today and every day from here on out--and when I'm not as good as being me on one day or another, I know I've got tomorrow to give it another go.
Another day, another donut, another opportunity to forget to eat healthy. That's me, after all--today, and every day from here on out.
Reina
